Prince Harry she has always had a complicated relationship with life as royalty – and that was especially true after her mother’s death, Princess Diana.
The Duke of Sussex, 41, shared his feelings about royal family life when he spoke at a charity event in Melbourne, Australia, on Thursday, April 16. Harry began the event with a 19-minute keynote speech on mental health and grief in which he said there were “many times” he felt “overwhelmed.”
“Times when I felt lost, betrayed or completely powerless. Times when the pressure – outside and inside – was always felt,” he said, via PA Media. “And there were times when, despite everything that was happening, I still had to pretend that everything was fine, so as not to disappoint anyone.”
After his speech, Harry spoke to the businessman and former politician Brendan Nelson and explained that she was unhappy with royal life after her mother’s death aged 36 “just before my 13th birthday” in August 1997.
“I was like, ‘I don’t want this job. I don’t want this role — wherever this goes, I don’t like it,'” he recalled. “It killed my mother and I was very against it, and I put my head in the sand for years and years.”
Harry went on to explain that he came to his position by thinking about what his mother would have wanted him to do.
“Finally, I realized, ‘Well, sit down, if there was someone else in this position, how could he use this platform and this skill and the resources that come with it to make a difference in the world?'” he said. “And that really changed my perspective.”
Diana died from injuries sustained in a car accident in Paris when she and her boyfriend at the time, Dodi Fayedrunning away from the pope. Harry later became an outspoken critic of the relentless media scrutiny of members of the royal family, especially as he and his wife, Meghan MarkleHe stepped down as a senior royal in 2020.
Speaking on Thursday, Harry said being a husband and father helped him a lot. (He and Meghan, 44, share son Prince Archie, 6, and daughter Princess Lilibet, 4.)
“If a parent is frustrated, the children feel it. When someone is supported, the families feel it,” he said, according to PA Media. “For me, one of the biggest shifts was when I realized that asking for help is not weakness.
Harry has previously opened up about how difficult it has been to accept his mother’s passing, believing for years that she may have lied about her death and that he will finally be reunited with her and his brother, Prince William.
“For a long time I did not want to accept that he is gone,” he said during the meeting 60 Minutes Discussion in 2023. “You know, he wouldn’t do this, but then again, maybe this is all part of the plan.”
When he was 20, Harry asked to see the police report on the crash, which included pictures of his mother after the incident. His private secretary warned him not to watch them all, and he heeded the advice.
“All I saw was the back of my mother’s head, lying in the back seat,” Harry recalled. “There were other horrific images, but I will forever thank him for denying me the ability to hurt myself by seeing that. Because that’s something that stays in your mind forever.”
